How can I talk to HR when the director is the owner’s wife?

Special to The Globe and Mail

THE QUESTION

I have a problem with the owner of the company I work for that should really be resolved by Human Resources. But how do you handle that situation when the director of HR is the owner’s wife?

THE FIRST ANSWER

Eleanor JamesCommunications consultant, the James Institute, Toronto

The conflict of interest in the company’s managerial structure has you between a rock and a hard place. You want to resolve the problem rather than take a more rash or destructive path, and that’s good. Do some homework and contact the Human Resources Professionals Association (HRPA) for assistance, which will be directed by the specific nature and scope of the problem. They might also direct you to an independent HR professional who could be a third party.

When you have the information, arrange to meet with your HR director, which is the proper channel and a no-fault move for you. Prepare yourself well for the meeting; think carefully about what you want to say and how you’re going to say it, including the problem, how it’s affecting your work and any suggestions you have. Choose your words carefully, use non-accusatory language and take out any emotional tone. Write it down and rehearse it out loud, a few times. All this preparation will calm you and greatly reduce your chances of inflaming the issue. You never know, the HR director might see your point or even agree with you. If not, there are lots of resources available based on what you want to do.


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